Talk About Suicide

Originally posted by me as dakotaismyson March 6, 2020

My mom told me today about a lady she knows who called her to express sympathy. Apparently this woman had lost someone in the past, mom knew about it… but today the lady decided it was ok to tell mom that the loss was the result of suicide. Mom was a little emotional when she asked why the lady didn’t choose to mention the why when it occurred. I told her my best guess is the supposed stigma of suicide.

If there is one constant about people, it’s that we have all made at least one decision that people don’t agree with. Every suicide survivor will tell you: we sure as heck don’t agree with our beloved (insert relationship here)’s decision to take their own life. I’m not sure why people feel ashamed or refuse to talk about it. We talk openly about not making financial mistakes or any other kind of life mistake…. except suicide. Why?

My son chose to leave me. That is hard to talk about. I don’t listen to my own advice and find myself “what if”ing everything, which is hard to talk about. I question myself as a mom, which is hard to talk about. I know my son (and daughter) know I loved them with every fiber of my being, yet my son still chose this making it hard to talk about.

According to the APA and AFSP: Suicide is the 10th-leading cause of death in the United States. It was the second-leading cause of death among people ages 10 to 34 and the fourth-leading cause among people ages 35 to 54. They estimate 1.4 MILLION suicides were attempted in 2018.

I think it’s time we all start talking about it. There’s no stigma when soooo many of us are affected by it. We need to talk about it. Survivors need to support each other. People need to understand what this does to families, that there is help to prevent these losses.

…I miss my son.